Funnies From A Four Year Old

Hannah has come up with some real gems over the last 6 months or so and I keep meaning to put them together and share them on here:


Mommy: What did you learn in preschool today?
Hannah: We learned that Jesus walked through the market.
Mommy: That's nice. Do you know where Jesus was going?
Hannah: I think he was going to Target.

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Daddy (slams finger in drawer): Mother..... (thinks better of finishing this sentence since Hannah is right there)
Hannah: Did you just call Mommy so she can kiss your boo-boo?

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Hannah: Jesus says I can wear dresses - it's in the bible.

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Mommy: Hannah, please calm down!
Hannah: I can't, it's in my story (referring to the show Super Why) - see, it says "Hannah acts hyper!"

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Hannah (singing): Send your mother off to church and then you wait for her to call (the lyrics are: Send your lover off to China and then you wait for her to call).

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Hannah: Mommy, Drew and I are getting married!
Mommy: I think you have to be a little older.
Hannah: Like 5?

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Hannah: I miss (insert name of whoever just left 10 seconds ago) SO much!

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Person in line at store: You are a pretty little girl.
Hannah: I know.

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Hannah: Hailey is my baby.
Mommy: Oh yeah? I'm pretty sure I remember when Hailey was born.
Hannah: Nope, I went to the hospital, they gave me a baby, and I fed it with my tummy. (Apperently when you go to the hospital, they just give you a kid. Could've saved myself some trouble if I knew that! Oh and apparently you feed babies with your tummy.)

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Hannah: It's so nice that Jesus put my very best friend Sarah next door to me (her best friend, of course, changes practically by the minute).

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Hannah (in the oh-so-dramatic voice that is only rivaled by Bryn, LOL): I will never leave my room ever again!